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Since I began running in 2012 I hadn’t raced anything longer than a 5K. Then over the summer, one of my best friends signed up for the White Mountain Milers Half Marathon and I thought, why not? I needed a running goal to stay on track with exercising anyway, and a half seemed exciting and doable. So I found a training plan, picked Clayton and Deb's brains for tips and tricks, and started getting ready for race day (October 30th). Let me tell you what I learned.

First of all, after a few weeks of adhering to the scheduled runs precisely as they were written, I realized I needed to be flexible and chill out. Listening to my body and rescheduling both short and long runs if necessary became as important as getting enough mileage week to week. When my right ankle was aching after my final long run, a 10-miler the weekend before the race, I took an extra day off and scaled back my short runs even though I was freaking out! But the extra rest paid off and I had no problems on race day.

As my long run mileage increased in late September, I spent way too much time Googling "running fuel." Turns out, Swedish Fish are packed with the kind of sugar and calories that runners like me dream of. Clayton confirmed what all my Googling suggested and after a test run (ha!) about 5 weeks before the half I was hooked. They gave me a boost to finish the last few miles of each long run and were easy to eat and digest on the go. And they saved me the trouble of trying to make fruit juice gummy candy in my own kitchen!

As the race approached, my excitement waned and my nerves went into overdrive. I anxiously planned meals, slept as much as possible, checked and rechecked my list of things to pack and generally stressed out. But being in North Conway, New Hampshire on the rainy day before the race was not only fun but had a calming effect. The leaves were brilliant, the air cool and crisp, the shops and restaurants diverting. And I was able to enjoy all of it because I knew I was prepared.

Race day was the best day! I was tired and anxious (Was I going to be cold? What if I got too hot? Why did I stay up till 11 when the plan had been to be asleep by 9?!?) but when the race started my body took over, I settled into my favorite pace, and made my way, mile by mile, through the most beautiful New Hampshire fall scenery. I had a moment of panic after completing 6 miles when the adrenaline and novelty of running a half wore off and my body felt drained. But after eating a few fish I got back in the groove and carried on.

And then, when I received encouraging text messages at mile 10, I started to push it. My last three miles were, surprisingly, my fastest. I'd been training to push the last two miles of each long run and that paid off in a major way. Although there was a hill at 12.9 (how could they?!!) and my mind was ready to give up, my legs kept pushing and I crossed the finish line 4 minutes ahead of my goal time!

All in all, what can I say except that for anyone on the fence about doing a half: do it. It is awesome!

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I told myself I wouldn't run another full marathon. Too much time. Too much commitment. Too much money for food stuffs (you've got to provide calories to use calories, people). However, somehow the running culture of Boston got to my restless bones, and I thought to myself, what if I could qualify for the Boston Marathon? Afraid of the failure, and the time I would be wasting if I did not qualify, I reasoned that the only way I would try would be if I ran for a charity; ergo Team in Training, a fundraising branch of the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society that raises money for blood cancer research and treatments. (Back story: my brother was diagnosed with cancer the year I left for college, and I can happily report that he has his health back plus a family of his own now.) When I looked up TNT’s upcoming races, one just happened to be a Boston qualifier: The Chicago Marathon.

I stuck to one of the BAA training plans and three months later, I was on my way to Chicago, making it just in time for the pre-race dinner. The dinner included trays of delicious carbohydrates, final fundraising updates, guest speakers, and hundreds of people gathered together in a large room all for the same purpose. I ran into a man in the elevator only to find out later that this was his 40th plus marathon running with Team in Training. He was recognized in the banquet room with a few others who had raised over $50,000 for blood cancer research over their years of involvement. They reminded me of my dad's cousin who ran with Team in Training for years (who one year ran for my brother) and who sadly was later diagnosed and lost his battle with cancer. 

A guest speaker also reminded me of my family and the way I was brought up. The woman speaking was on another TNT team (the Alaska team). Her six-year-old son had unfortunately lost his battle with cancer, and she was heartbroken. It seems silly, but the part that got me was that for his Make a Wish experience, all he wanted to do was drive a John Deere tractor. My family farms, and driving a tractor is something everyone in my family gets to experience. Thankfully this lady's son got to experience the simple joy when he got to drive tractors all day at John Deere's headquarters in Michigan before he lost his battle with cancer. The woman was encouraged by a friend to participate in Team in Training after his passing. Though it was tough for her at times, she continued to go to practices as a form of therapy almost and their team's mantra became fittingly, "Run like a Deere." I decided I would do just that.

The next morning, all of the TNT runners met at 5:30 AM to shake out some nerves, encourage one another, and hear one more inspirational story. Once again, the experience hit a little too close to home. We were all given pennies and were recited a poem about a penny as a traveling vessel for an angel. It was written by another individual that did not win his battle with cancer. The Christmas after my Papa's (grandfather's) passing, all of us in the family were given pennies with the stamp of an angel on it. He never failed to pick up spare change, even a penny, when he found coins lying on the street. That morning, we were all encouraged to leave the penny we were given somewhere along the course. I had a feeling that my Papa was with me that day.

I checked my bags, stood in line for the porta potties, and made my way to the corale with the rest of the runners in a buzzing maze humming to the tune of excitement, nerves, and Portuguese/Spanish accents. I oddly felt more and more at home. The day was beautiful and the weather was set for perfect running weather: a cool mid-50 degrees. Before I knew it, the starting gun sounded, and there was no turning back.

The course was great! You really experienced most of the neighborhoods of Chicago. You can even see the virtual map here. It's basically like running it in warp speed. The aid stations and volunteers were AMAZING! There were so many great people cheering on us runners and providing entertainment along the way. My top 10 moments: 1) A sign that said, "If Trump can run, so can you;" 2) A golden lab dressed as a bumble bee; 3) Eating the Swedish Fish that Sarah gave me along the way; 4) Dropping my penny on the course; 5) A drag stage thumping some pop classics; 6) Seeing one of my super enthusiastic coaches, Laura, at mile 16 yelling with encouragement and the prideful chant of "GO TEAM;" 7) The rhythmic Chinese drum in Chinatown; 8) Lip sinking to Bohemian Rhapsody and slightly air drumming in the final stretch of the race; 9) Passing people who weren't running for a charity (don't get me wrong, it's great that people run marathons whatever the reason, but there's something gratifying about representing a great organization like TNT towards the front of a pack); 10) FINISHING!

Hopped up on endorphins, I was ecstatic to find a free Goose IPA directly after the finish! Yes, it was handed to me even before the metal, but I'd rather finish like that any day! I cheered to my dad's cousin in a silent/subtle act of solidarity and enjoyed what the remainder of the day had to offer. It involved a quick change back at the hotel, watching a few of my fellow teammates finish, a second Goose IPA, texting with family and friends, and live music. Did I mention Giordiano's deep dish pizza, accompanied by another beer? After sufficiently refueling, I hobbled back to the hotel, stretched a bit, and slept the most magnificent sleep of my entire life.

Despite my reluctance to sign up for another marathon, I couldn't have asked for a better race and experience. The Chicago marathon is seriously one of the best organized races I have EVER experienced. I felt connected to the TNT cause. I felt family and friends with me that weekend in spirit. Grand total for my fundraising: $2,580.88! Almost $200 over my fundraising goal! My team raised over $40,000 as a whole! And ... well, I guess I'll say it, I qualified for Boston! Thanks friends and family for all of your support! Thanks to everyone who donated! Special thanks to Black Ink Harvard Square and Marathon Sports Brookline for contributing to my fundraising efforts. And congrats to all of my fellow teammates who ran their marathons and reached their fundraising goals!

Stay tuned for 2018! I think I'm running again with TNT! Smudge, you may not know this, but I'm thinking of having you guys help me with a fundraising idea called, Make Purple Sell (it's fitting for both Smudge Ink and Team in Training).

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Two weekends ago, I made my way to the Space Gallery in Portland, Maine, for the first ever New England Art Book Fair. Much like the Northampton Print & Book Fair (see my recap here), this gathering of creative heads will become an essential staple in not only their respective artists communities, but also the greater New England communities. It was exciting to see the crowds and packed rooms. Such high attendance of these projects tells me there are people out there who want to see art, meet artists, and have a much more interactive experience.

(image: Pickwick Independent Press fine art printing facility)

(image: Alex Lukas)

I was at the event for Saturday, and there were a number of cool workshops and lectures throughout the day at Pickwick Independent Press right upstairs from the gallery. PIP is a community print shop specializing in intaglio and letterpress. I was very excited to attend a short talk by Alex Lukas who is a printmaker/artist out of Pittsburgh. In his talk, Memorialization, Colonialism and Empowerment Through Public Name Writing, Lukas discussed the historical context and the difference between Louis C. Clark scrawling his name on cave walls during his exploration of the Louisiana Purchase to white graffiti writers entering neighborhoods like Harlem in the 1980’s. Very heady, thought provoking stuff. Alex Lukas was also tabling his project, Cantab Publishing, which include really beautiful Risograph, photocopy, offset, and silkscreen books.

(image: Draw Down Books)

There were many of the same vendors I met in Northampton, like Draw Down Books from Connecticut. DDB are publishing house that releases a lot of cool different projects including small zine-like books and larger hardcover monographs showing work of individual artists, surveys of graphic design projects and also works that serve to critique contemporary graphic design practices.

(image: Sylvia Kim)

Sylvia Kim is an artist local to Boston and she was selling her project, Halfling Zine, a photography zine dedicated to maintaining and creating dialogue between photographers like herself. In her latest issue she chose to represent only female artists. Her books are beautifully printed and very well designed.

(image: Jim Croft)

Jim Croft truly stood out as having the most unique offerings at NEABF. He is a longtime traditional book maker. He could talk to you for hours about all the awesome stuff he’s been creating. From wooden hardcover books complete with paper made from flax he grows and harvests on his property to intricate metal clasps custom made for each project.

(image: Jim Croft's handmade bone folders)

He was selling an array of bone folders sourced from local farms. Elk, moose, deer and more to help you get those crisp folds. It’s really something to see artists of all walks of life dedicated to their craft and creative process.

These past few events I’ve been a vendor at have been great experiences. I’ve met some new friends and potential collaborators, and I’ve seen old friends doing new things. What I perceive to be the greatest gain from this experience is a newfound vigor to get some new projects and artworks out of my brain and into real life! I’m excited to see what develops! While I don’t have any book or print fairs lined up in the next couple weeks, I’ll be letting you, our dedicated readership, in on all the great holiday craft and art markets hitting the scene in December. See you guys then!

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I had the pleasure of sharing the A.P.E. Gallery this past weekend with a multitude of amazing artists and publication houses at the 2nd annual Northampton Print & Book Fair (NPBF). This year, NPBF was part of a much larger two-day print extravaganza, Printworks2016, that also included the 14th (!) Annual Print Fair North hosted by Zea Mays Printmaking and a live printmaking demonstration.

Lyell Castonguay from BIG INK spearheaded the large format woodblock printing project. He’s been bringing together artists of all sorts to carve massive woodblocks (at least 24” x 36” in size) and then amass at a local printshop (like ZMP) with as many as a dozen at a time to help print a short edition of each block. It takes a lot of logistics, coordination and teamwork.

(image: Erin and Taylor of Selfish Magazine)

Much like the previous event I wrote about, there were all kinds of cool and talented people around. I got to meet a lot of really interesting people like Erin and Taylor from Selfish Magazine and we talked about the very basic problem of paying artists for their work. In some creative fields like writing, it’s near impossible to get a deal without agents representing your work. Independent publishers can break those walls down! Selfish Magazine is bi-yearly publication that brings together female-identifying artists and writers to create for the sake of creation and be totally unapologetic. Really awesome and inspiring stuff.

(image: Driton and Chris of Gentlepersons Gently)

Driton and Chris of Gentlepersons Gently were also tabling their collaborative and individual wares. These guys know how to hustle; I see them at virtually every fair or independent market! They’re a designer/illustrator duo with some strange ideas. “We’re mostly trying to see if other people think our inside jokes are funny.” From art zines to pillows, t-shirts to engraved sewing scissors, they have a lot of really fun stuff.

(image: Sean Sawick)

I ran into my buddy Sean Sawicki a poet and artist active in the Pioneer Valley community. He had a couple great new art zines which were traded for stuff I had been working on all summer. It was great to touch base with another artist who shares an artistic vision very similar to my own. We talked about the fair and how it’s kind of like Christmas, where all your art family are in town for a couple days, except we don’t have to worry about making excuses to your overpowering uncle as to why “your life isn’t going anywhere.”

(image: Emily of ILSSA)

I was tabling right next to Emily of ILSSA: Impractical Labor in Service of the Speculative Arts which is a “membership organization for those who use obsolete technology in conceptual or experimental ways.” They look to help improve the “spiritual working conditions” of artists who use methods that are “out of date” and therefore lack monetary value. Through mail-in surveys, which are these beautifully designed forms, they hope to help the individual artists reflect on their practice. All their reading materials, workbooks, survey forms were created using a Risograph or are letterpress printed. It was interesting to me to talk with the fellow artists, the publishers and an actual union dedicated to helping artists determine the value of their practice!

(image: packed inside the A.P.E. Gallery!)

There was so much amazing talent in that gallery space! I manage to make it to a lot of tables and introduce myself and make a trade before the caffeine-addled anxiety became too much for me to handle. These events are so great for networking and making new friends. I’m already looking forward to next year!

Next week I’ll be telling you guys about the amazing fair in Portland, Maine, I just got back from. See you then!

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Molly rounds out our team with her quiet yet sweet and personable nature. If we handed out yearbook awards, we all agree she would be voted as having the best style (in both dress and hair categories!). And she clearly has good taste in tortilla chips too, coming in second in our recent chip throwdown. But when Molly isn’t tackling wholesale orders or discussing the drama that is Dance Moms with April, she is an extraordinary painter and artist. When asked about her art, Molly generously opened up about her inspiration and creative process, passing along some of the best advice she has received …

(image: Molly in front of her painting, Insect)

(image: The One With the Other by Molly)

What themes and concepts do you find yourself exploring in your work?

In my work, I explore social constructions of beauty, specifically those constructs aimed at women. I look at how society puts a certain type of pressure on women, no matter what age, race, or social status, to be beautiful and perfect. We are constantly bombarded with images of idealistic and unrealistic standards through magazines, advertisements, and social media, platforms that I typically use as both research and as my “sketchbook.” I take these images of ideal beauty and deconstruct them. I warp the figure and make it strange. I explore the idea of elegance and vulgarity, beauty and the grotesque, searching for a harmony between the two. Unlike today’s society that for the most part discourages women from being anything but ideal, I aim to show that even if a body is deconstructed and warped and filled with imperfections, it is still beautiful. Strangeness is beautiful.

I also explore the history of women’s work and its relationship to the world of fine art, which is historically a male dominated industry. Although I predominately identify as a painter, I also weave, sew, and embroider. I combine these techniques into my paintings to show that these historically “women’s crafts” cannot only be part of, but can be equally as important as painting.

(image: The One With the Legs by Molly. In progress.)

(image: The One With the Legs by Molly. In progress.)

(image: The One With the Legs by Molly)

Do you have a favorite piece of work or project of yours?

I have several pieces that I love, but I’d have to say that my all-time favorite painting would be The One With the Legs (pictured above). This was a real turning point in my artistic growth—technically, aesthetically, and conceptually. This was a very frustrating piece for me to paint, spending weeks and weeks repainting a different version of the same image. After deciding one day that this just wasn’t working, I made the quick decision to completely paint over what I had been working on. I took the chance, and to my surprise it worked! From that point on, I decided once and for all to not look at my paintings as precious pieces of art. They are each individual experiments, and if you can paint it once, you can paint it again! I kept some of my original painting in my “new” painting, and absolutely loved the effect that that had. All of a sudden, my once boring image of a female figure transformed into a warped, disassembled, multiple-legged figure. It was interesting, ambiguous, and unique … and I just loved it! I have used this technique of painting and repainting for almost every painting since!

(image: The One With the Hand by Molly. Collage.)

(image: The One With the Hand by Molly)

Would you say you have an artistic process? Do you adhere to a routine when you work?

I would definitely say that I have an artistic process! Before I begin painting, I usually look at a lot of fashion magazines (my favorite is W Magazine), and collage images of figures, combining bodies, parts of bodies, patterns, and color. I also look at photographs online and on Instagram! I then use these collages and images as a reference (or a “sketch”) and begin painting. For the most part, my paintings never turn out how I expect them to, but that’s what I love that about them. After I have painted something on the canvas, I decide if I even like it, and if I don’t (which is more often than not!), I will completely paint, cut, stitch, embroider, or collage over what I have already created. I love experimenting and taking risks while I work on my paintings, and believe that “messing up” only leads to the most unexpected results!

(image: section of Gustav Klimt's Judith II taken by Mirage Bookmark)

If you could only have one piece of art in your life, what would it be?

Gustav Klimt has always been an inspiration for me. I admire the elegance and romance in his work, and how he contrasts the beauty of his paintings with elements of chaos and the grotesque. I studied abroad in Venice, Italy, and went to Cà Pesaro, a modern art museum located in a beautiful Venetian Baroque palace. While walking through the museum, I literally stopped in my tracks at the sight of an actual Gustav Klimt painting (I had never seen one in real life before!). This painting that I proceeded to stare at, study, and sketch for over an hour was his 1909 oil painting titled Judith II. I have so many paintings that I admire, but I’d have to say that this is the painting that I’d absolutely love to own!

(image: Molly and her mom)

What was the best advice given to you as an artist?

The best advice I’ve been given is to be fearless with your work and don’t be afraid to fail. I’m sure many people have heard something like this before, and it might be a bit cliché, but this piece of advice really stuck with me! It took me until my junior year of college to really be ok with the thought of “failing.” I am definitely my own worst critic and can be very hard on the work I create, and I used to take it personally if I had a bad critique. But, I finally realized that that my paintings are not always a reflection of myself as an artist. If you have a bad critique or receive poor feedback, it doesn’t mean that you are a bad or untalented artist. It just means that it wasn’t your strongest piece, and all you have to do is learn from it and move on! Be fearless and you will be surprised by the outcome, good or bad. You won’t know what will happen until you try it, and that way of thinking without the constant fear of failing has really helped me grow as an artist!

Thanks, Molly! If you'd like to check out out more of Molly's fearless artwork, you can visit her online portfolio. Or follow her here for more glimpses of her artistic process and vision!  

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